Saturday, November 30, 2019
THE MONTH BEFORE CHRISTMAS
By Marvin Wolf
‘Twas the month before Christmas and all through the city
decorations were up but the sight wasn’t pretty
for although Thanksgiving was still barely here
all the stores were dressed up for the end of the year.
Sleighbells here, reindeers there, holly boughs all around
but nary a Tom Turkey feather is found.
‘twas as though Saint Nick put the bird in a hearse
and decreed to Thanksgiving, henceforth, Christmas comes first.
That ancient old Elf must have screamed with a wail,
“That turkey interferes with our holiday sales”;
so we’re left with no choice but to conquer the bird,
and sing Christmas carols till no gobble is heard.
A Thanksgiving sale is but a single buy day;
so lets perk it up with a heavy Black Friday,
so out with old feathers, pilgrim hats won’t be seen;
we’ll pretend those props came from last Halloween.
We need to make sales and to keep our costs down
so you’ll see Christmas windows all over the town.
decorating windows twice; why that’s nothing but trouble
And we prefer Ho Ho Ho to Gobble Gobble Gobble.
Stores open late, tinsel sparkling with glee.
MasterCard, Visa – final spending spree.
but this holiday season’s no season for thanks,
while the Federal Reserve elves print money for banks.
Our economy needs consumers so let’s spend for Santa
Never mind when the bills come we will all need Mylanta;
But resistance is futile; we must accept our fate.
so Merry Christmas to all on this November 28.
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